On Thumpers and Gliders and Other Differences

There are thumpers in this world. And there are gliders. At least that is my experience. They are as opposite from one another as the South Pole is from the North. Gliders are often upset and bothered by the sounds of a thumper; thumpers, generally, are not at all ruffled by gliders.

A glider enters a room quietly, barely making any sound, unless wearing high heels. On the other hand, a thumper can be heard approaching from quite a distance, with or without shoes as the sound of footsteps reverberates through the air. On occasion, the force is so solid, glassware rattles in cupboards. Such is the case with me. I openly admit and confess to being a thumper. I walk hard. And that is an understatement. In fact "thud" would probably be a more accurate description than "thump."

It had been a while since I gave it much thought. As a gardener, I don't make much of a sound walking behind a lawn mower and, living alone, am oblivious with no one to remind me. While cleaning a house today, I was barefooted. Because I land solidly on my heels first, the bare feet amplify the impact. I heard and observed the thump and the glassware. Memories of the chastisements from days gone by filled my mind. "Why DO you walk so hard? Can't you walk more softly? You're shaking the whole house. Try walking like a lady." The comments from gliders were gone, but not forgotten. I began processing the memories.

The unspoken message delivered was that something was wrong with me. I needed to change. I tried--more than once.The success rate was right at 0%, along with efforts to transform my curly hair to bone-straight, rid myself of a down-right stubborn streak, eliminate the procrastination factor, and change countless other traits and characteristics that make up the person I am.

It took a while to understand it isn't a right or wrong thing. It is a difference. I'm not the same as others. However, when one is struggling with self-acceptance and self-confidence, it's a monkey wrench thrown in that takes time and sorting to figure out.

Another person's differences are not cause for a rush to judgment. It is so easy to react, to respond critically without even thinking. We all handle situations differently, and when that is viewed as being right or wrong, negativity enters in. For example, I drive in a manner that is different from any other driver on the road. How often does that upset the one in the car behind me as I cautiously wait for traffic to pass before turning onto a street? I have a habit of asking questions I already know the answer to. That creates its own frustrations in my family. And I haven't even begun to discuss the differences in the way we each think and view ethics, philosophy, politics, the environment, nature, and religion...just to name a few. 

We are individuals; therefore, we are different from one another. No two people are the same.

Much of the focus in our country is placed on racial biases and prejudices. There is, however, a bias, prejudice, and an intolerance developing in our society and our nation toward any who disagree with those in the position of power and control. "We are right; therefore, you are wrong." Not so. 

We think, believe, and act differently, but they are differences, not a justification for division, rejection, or judgment. I am friends with many people with whom I differ in opinion and belief. That does not make me right and them wrong or vice versa. It means we are individuals, with a right to our respective points of view.

My uniqueness, including that of being a thumper, is God-given. So, too, is yours. God help us as a nation if we get to the point where difference is not respected, expected, and allowed. We are not--and must not be--clones. And, for myself as well, I need to be very careful I am not coming from a place of judgment when viewing other's differences, be they inner or outer. 

I told a former client my "thumper" story, telling of the criticisms and harsh comments I've received over the years. "Did you know that is a good thing?" she asked. She went on to say her doctor told her walking with impact increases bone density. In fact, the impact is what is important. Who knew? Certainly not the gliders in my life. Nor I. It's all in how you look at it, isn't it? 

May I treat others with the same level of respect I would like given to me--despite our differences.

"Do not judge, so that you may not be judged.

For the judgment you give will be the judgment you get."

Matthew 7: 1, 2