Doldrums: part of the ocean near the equator, abounding in calms, which sometimes prevent all sailing progress for weeks; a state of listlessness, ennui, or tedium.
The doldrums have set in. You know, where life feels stagnant; it's all same ol', same ol', a merry-go-round, a hamster wheel. In gardening seasons past the description has been that I have "hit a wall." A daughter very gently reminds me that it happens this time every year. And she is right. Our temperatures have been in the near 90's or above for at least 3 weeks now, and everything has a tired look and feel about it, including me. Parched, dry grasses are everywhere. The lush look of spring in Oregon is long gone. The trees are the only thing which can tout the advertisement that Oregon is green. For those who irrigate, those with vegetable gardens and beautiful flower gardens, the look and feel of despair isn't so prevalent. After having lived with wells for most of my life I refuse to pay what the city charges to keep my world green. That expense is a factor for many others as well and so brown and dry is the theme at this time of the year.
This, however, has a different feel to it. Something else is happening within me, something besides 90 degree temperatures in Oregon's Willamette Valley in August. I feel like I am stalled, not making the growth and progress I love. When this happens, I don't look to my physical world but rather, to my inner world and to my Creator, searching and questioning.
Introspection is good. Sitting quietly and looking deep within results in answers, truths being revealed which don't begin and end in the human mind or one's outer environment. The One who made me knows me better than I know myself. My experience is that the source, the cause of my state is most often far removed from what I would ever speculate or think. And so it is once again today. I could not deny the truth of that revelation upon seeing it and being made aware. Progress begins.
There is no moving forward, no escaping the doldrums until issues within are faced and dealt with. The joy of it lies in its simplicity. All that is necessary is asking for truth and facing it. In that single stroke the beginning of change and change itself takes place. Not a bad deal, I say.
"Seek and you shall find."
1 comment:
I recommend a good walk -- not a walk while working in the garden! I mean a walk along the river, or on the Ridgeline. A walk in nature where spirit speaks loudly and clearly, if you Seek it. But as you say, Seek and you will find.Gotta seek it. I'll walk with you if you wish.
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